Parts work: meeting the many sides of you

Have you ever said something like, “Part of me really wants to do this… but another part of me is scared.”

That’s ultimately parts work in action. You might not have known it at the time, but you were naming something really wise and deeply human—the reality that we are made up of many parts of self, each with their own voice, experience, and need.

Parts work is a therapeutic approach that helps us get to know those internal parts—not to fix them, not to silence them, but to understand and care for them.

You are not just one thing

You might have a part of you that is high-achieving, driven, and organized. Another part might feel tired all the time, unsure, or afraid to slow down.

Maybe there's a part that’s deeply critical or protective—and another that still holds the tenderness of a younger you.

None of these parts are “bad” or broken. They all have reasons for being here.

In parts work, we assume that every part—no matter how confusing or uncomfortable—is trying to help you in some way. Even the ones that show up with anger, avoidance, overthinking, or shutdown.

When we meet these parts with curiosity instead of judgment, something powerful can begin to shift.

Why do we have parts?

Parts often form as responses to life experiences. They step in to help us survive, cope, belong, or make sense of things—especially when we didn’t have the support or safety we needed.

Some parts take on protector roles, trying to keep us safe from getting hurt again.

Other parts carry the emotional weight of past pain—they might feel like they’re still stuck in a moment that never got resolved.

And some parts just want connection, expression, or relief.

Rather than thinking of ourselves as one singular identity, parts work helps us understand that we contain many—and they all deserve compassion.

Working with parts in therapy

In our work together, we might begin to notice and gently explore:
• Which parts are most present in your daily life
• Which parts tend to take over when you're anxious or overwhelmed
• Which younger parts may still be holding unprocessed pain
• How these parts relate to one another—and to you

You don’t have to analyze or “figure out” your parts right away. Often, just acknowledging that a part of you is showing up is enough.

Over time, we can help the system within you feel more understood, more supported, and less at war with itself.

And as we do that, you—the Self—begin to lead.

Not from force or control, but from a grounded, compassionate center.

There’s nothing wrong with you

If you’ve ever felt confused by the contradictions inside you—like why you freeze up in certain moments, or why you say yes when you really want to say no—it’s not because you’re flawed.

It’s because different parts of you are trying to get your attention. And they all have a story to tell.

Therapy doesn’t get rid of your parts. It helps them feel less alone.

Final thought

You are not just your anxiety. You are not just your trauma, your coping mechanisms, your inner critic, or even your confidence.

You are a complex, layered, deeply connected human being made up of many parts—and each of them is worthy of care.

So when a part of you speaks up, try not to shut it down.
Instead, pause. Listen. Be curious.

You might be surprised by how much wisdom you’ve got living inside you.

Warmly,
Abbey